A Shed of Chemistry and Wholesome Test for Patience

If there is one thing that I hate about chemistry laboratory it is that it is constantly testing my patience, not only my patience for those dreadful experiments but also my patience in other people.

This morning I had my laboratory class on Chem 31.1 or a.k.a. Organic chemistry. Supposedly, we are only about to perform experiment four or the distillation exercise but for whatever reason, our teacher also decided to do experiment seven which is about the solubility of certain substances.

I don’t want to tell the exact details of my horrible feeling and experience on that exact time, but I do want to make a point that right now I am totally on my limit. I hate the fact that I am actually pissed not only on the results of our experiments or to my group mates but to my self as well. I hate the fact that I can’t control my self; I hate the fact that I can’t control my patience. It’s just that every time I have my laboratory class, at the end of the day I would always go home exhausted and totally pissed.

I really don’t know whether the reason for my dilemma is my lack of knowledge or skill in chemistry or it’s just that I am expecting too much from myself. I also don’t know whether the problem really arises from me or from my group mates. But whatever it is, I just know that something is wrong and I am afraid that if we are not able to neither correct nor detect those deficiencies, it might affect our grades and our understanding about organic chemistry. It’s just that, at this point in time, I cannot afford to fail. I do not want to fail. I do not want to fail again knowing that I actually did my best, that I actually did my part. I do not want to fail again because someone or something pulled me down. And if ever we can never correct those insufficiencies, I am just hoping and praying that time and fate would show us a little kindness.

I know God has a reason for everything, I know that God as of now wants me to learn something out of this. Whatever it is, all I can do is trust and believe in him.

For those people; Jed, Ericka, Krisel, Kricel, Che, Kuya Nani and others, thank you so much; thank you so much for trying to lift me up and for understanding my shortcomings.